29 March 1922- 29 September 2014

FEB and his sweetheart

92 years is a lot of life.  

Four years old

Mostly, this is how I remember both of them

Soil microbiology in action!

And now I'm wondering if he didn't hang on until he was 92 so he could be the same age as Grandma?  Hm.










When I was a child my grandparents always called me 'snookie'.  I have no idea why, but I do know that I treasured this nickname and insisted on introducing myself as  'Joy Snookie Slade' as if it were my full legal name.  On at least one occasion in school I got in trouble for insisting that it really was my middle name, so much did I treasure the affectionate moniker.  Even now that recollection brings a smile to my face, and in the present day when my Dad addresses cards 'to Snookie' it makes me downright happy.  Not only did my grandparents give me the nickname, but because they loved me so completely that name has come to represent their love to me.  

I don't ever remember Grandpa getting flustered about anything.  At his most perturbed a solemn 'Great Scott!' might escape his lips.  Of course, I was not part of any of the fixit projects he seemed to get roped into whenever Grandma and Grandpa came to visit so perhaps I am simply missing knowledge of his true temper, but somehow I doubt it.  Even recovering from knee surgery I recall him stoically completing his knee exercises without any of the vociferous complaining that I demonstrated when I had surgery last year.  I don't mean to say that Grandpa was glum, but his disposition tended towards the mellowly happy, even when bemoaning the sorry state of government as he pontificated from his rocking chair.  Even less-than terrific news was greeted with the 'Oh, dear' which was spoken in a tone more resigned than flustered.  And though Grandma's energy was much more vibrant and active they still made a perfectly complementary couple.

The one part of Grandpa I think I've inherited is his love of gardening.  I remember lots of talk about what was planted that year, how the boysens were doing and his other trees and plants.   Even though my thumb tends towards the black instead of green I am glad that that small part of Grandpa lives on in me.  And I'm also grateful that the smell of walnut trees takes me back to the happy sanctuary of Grandpa's back yard, being completely assured of the love that surrounded me whenever we visited 821 A street in Davis.

I will be forever grateful for the heritage my loving grandfather has given me, and especially for his example of true love towards Grandma.   His tireless affection and care even when the twilight of dementia meant she no longer knew him will stand in my memory as an example of true love.

2014 has not been a great year for us Cooks

Hi there!  How are you?  Isn't it crazy that summer is already over?  I know!  It was like 3 seconds ago the kids were throwing their backpacks down and cheering that school was out and now we're in our third week of the new year.  So weird.

We are all doing well, except Ben has cancer, so there's that.  It's Follicular Lymphoma.

Many of you know that Ben had surgery this summer right before his birthday.  During surgery the surgeon saw that his lymph node was enlarged, so he took a sample to biopsy it.  Ben forgot all about it because: surgery drugs, until biopsy came back with a diagnosis of follicular lymphoma.   He's had a PET scan and will be doing some more sonograms to determine exactly how much he has.

From everything we've learned it seems that this is a disease which will not be cured, but can be managed.  Most people are diagnosed in their 60's, so we have great hope that this early-ish diagnosis will mean that Ben has many healthy years ahead of him.   Ben is at a very low stage so waiting and watching is the recommended course of action for now, with the option of immunological treatment.  If you are looking at Dr Google right now, his FLIPI score is 0-1.

I'm sorry if you're learning this from the blog.    Problem is, there's not a great way to let people know, since Hallmark doesn't make a 'hey, we've got cancer!' card.    We've waited to tell until we had a second opinion and the kids had time to process it all.   I suppose you can consider this the official end of our 'denial' phase.

It appears that chemo is in our future, just not the immediate future.

We know that we are greatly blessed to have family and friends who love us and from whom we have derived great strength.  Please know that we love you and are grateful to have you in our lives.  We also know we will be needing to lean a little on our family and friends as we deal with this, so we are especially thankful.

You should be happy to know that the kids have inherited my dark sense of humor.  The stuffed animal presented to Noah by the social worker at the cancer center has been named 'cancer'.  Try explaining that name to friends who don't know!